When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
