we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
