Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize