Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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