I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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