i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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