Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
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