Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
