I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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