I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
