Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
They have beer where we have blood.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
