Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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