I'm so fucking centered right now
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
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I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
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i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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