Its about making memories worth repressing
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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