Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize