just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
they're like a gay fantastic four
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
i've created a new STD.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize