I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
