This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
