You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize