is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
