well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
