It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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