Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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