I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
