no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
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Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
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I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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