Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her. http://tfl.nu/xmhd
  Replies (26) Good night (5005) Bad night (843)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant http://tfl.nu/7q0r
  Replies (191) Good night (933) Bad night (11957)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome http://tfl.nu/x7k0
  Replies (8) Good night (5174) Bad night (1535)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well... http://tfl.nu/dwtt
  Replies (16) Good night (1413) Bad night (3267)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong. http://tfl.nu/7bl9
  Replies (7) Good night (1177) Bad night (2710)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix. http://tfl.nu/azut
  Replies (5) Good night (1501) Bad night (738)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what? http://tfl.nu/cv8q
  Replies (53) Good night (1299) Bad night (5303)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol http://tfl.nu/w5ds
  Replies (5) Good night (1215) Bad night (804)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.

  (989): View more from Michigan

  this is the most serious roommate agreement ever

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way. (989): this is the most serious roommate agreement ever http://tfl.nu/m5zb
  Replies (5) Good night (1554) Bad night (400)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger. http://tfl.nu/btv5
  Replies (2) Good night (383) Bad night (781)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats. http://tfl.nu/ohp9
  Replies (2) Good night (1183) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense. http://tfl.nu/5wxg
  Replies (2) Good night (526) Bad night (411)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay... http://tfl.nu/ag6z
  Replies (5) Good night (796) Bad night (322)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely. http://tfl.nu/lx5s
  Replies (7) Good night (353) Bad night (902)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys http://tfl.nu/a0n0
  Replies (2) Good night (681) Bad night (396)

Randomize