It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
