No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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