so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize