it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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