The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
