Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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