singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
