You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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