Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
We had to coat check the pizza.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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