I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize