super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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