why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
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The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
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I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize