I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize