sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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