But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
