we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Randomize