you guys were way drunker than both of me
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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