maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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