check it out our google latitudes are spooning
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
