how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
