We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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