We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
3pm strippers are depressing
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Randomize
