I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
