Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
