dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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